The holiday shopping season is upon us once again and many of us will be feeling the rush to buy presents. And while buying presents can be fun it can also be stressful. As we make lists of friends and family, co-workers and teachers and start wracking our brains about what to buy and worrying about how much it all costs, often we completely lose sight of what it means to give and receive gifts. We tend to forget that gratitude is the attitude underlying the customs of giving around the world.
A gift is defined as something given without expectation of anything in return and gratitude is the feeling or sense of deep appreciation for things we have or receive from others or from other sources such as the gifts of the earth. The reasons for giving are many. We give to offer thanks, to show our love or appreciation for another person, to help and support people and communities or as a way to make someone feel special on their birthday ! Giving and gratitude seem to go hand in hand and strengthen our sense of connection to each other and to the sources which sustain us all on this planet.
How can gratitude guide us when we head out to the shops or go online to buy holiday gifts ? And how can gratitude help us make more sustainable choices when we shop ? If we take the time to remember how much we already have and start from a feeling of abundance and fullness instead of need or lack we have already set the stage for more mindful and considered choices. We may choose to give fewer gifts, to those people we really know and care for enough to find just what they need or will make them happy. And if we buy fewer gifts we may be able to spend a little more for things which are good quality and will be used and enjoyed for years to come. If we start with an attitude of appreciation for the materials and energy required to produce things and for the ideas and skills of the people who are involved in making them perhaps we will make choices based on respect for materials and people.
But what about the shopping ? We have made a (shorter) list, have a few ideas and think we have found the perfect gift for someone, so now it's time to ask the essential questions: Will they LOVE it ? Do they NEED it ? Will they USE it often ? Will they like it enough to KEEP it ? Will they still like it in 5 YEARS ? If you can answer YES to at least two or three of these questions then you probably have found the perfect gift, the gift which will bring joy and the kind of smile to someone's face when they feel you really know them and have made a thoughtful choice. Their gratitude is your gift :)
This approach to shopping may feel unfamiliar at first and you may feel that you're leaving people out, not giving enough or not as much as other people. You may worry that someone will give you a gift and you didn't get one for them. But, just remember your decision to let gratitude guide your gifting this year and resist making comparisons. Instead show your true appreciation for gifts you've received. Everyone is happy for a genuine "thank you" and a warm smile!
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